Sunday, January 29, 2006
Personally I don’t have any of the old Nintendo games on my computer. This isn’t a moral stand, it’s just that I don’t want the people behind me judging my video game abilities by how I play in class when half of my attention is directed towards the professor. Instead of this I play the pinball game that’s pre-installed on just about every computer.
Now, combine this with the fact that some random organization gave away free nachos at lunch a week or two ago and this law school thing seems like a elementary-middle-high schooler’s wonderland. It all depends on how livable you make it.
Sunday, January 22, 2006
I will kick things off by thanking the one man who made this run to the Super Bowl in Detroit possible...
No, my ego hasn’t gone dangerously out of control. I have empirical evidence to prove this seemingly outlandish claim. Think of all the success that came about in South Florida once I got to Miami. The Marlins went from bottom dwellers to World Series Champions and playoff contenders the next year (upon my leaving they’ve since gone straight down the toilet). How about the Heat? When I got there they were a somewhat overachieving team of scrappers, by the time I left they had drafted the best young talent in the NBA (Dwayne Wade) and traded for the most dominant player in the NBA (Shaquille O’Neal). And what about the Dolphins? Sure there were hard times during the 4-12 season, but before I left they had hired Nick Saban and started the rebuilding process that will soon bring the franchise back to greatness.
Now let’s look at Pittsburgh once I arrived. We all know that my presence is what has gotten the Steelers over the hump this year. The Penguins? Sure their record is horrible now but my arrival in town brought the drafting of “The Next One” Sydney Crosby. Lastly, I’m calling it right now, the Pirates led by Jason Bay will win the Wild Card next year.
So, does your city need a sports Renaissance? You know who to call.
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
So, if you ever wonder how so many heartless ambulance chasing lawyers are able to sleep at night the answer is because they’re just making up for the fact that law school wasted 3 years of their life grading them on exams that deemphasize characteristics and skills that are actually useful in the practice of their chosen profession. Then, after this the best justification law schools have is to just say “we can’t change?” I think I’m going to try this when I get my first job, it’ll go a little something like this
Adam’s Boss: Hey Samons, why were you an hour late to work this morning?
Adam: I’m not really what you’d call a “morning person” boss, there’s really nothing I can do to change this.
Adam's Gorilla: [Grunt, Scream, Grunt].
(Insert awkward silence for roughly 0.9 seconds)
Adam’s Boss: YOU’RE FIRED!!!
Well, at least the dean’s answer is consistent with what we were told at orientation about the methods employed by law schools. There it was said that “You might wonder why law schools teach what they teach the way that they teach it. The answer is because this is the way it has been done for centuries.” Let’s see how this logic will help me once I get out into the work place.
Adam’s Boss: Samons, why do you insist on writing all your case briefs, motions, and summaries in hieroglyphics? Our lawyers and the judges are getting sick of having to translate everything you write.
Adam: I do this because pictorial representations such as hieroglyphs are humanity's oldest form of communication and have been used from the time of cave drawings up to modern day graffiti.
Adam’s Boss: Thanks for the history lesson, you’re fired you ineffective worthless piece of crap.
So what’d we learn today kids?
1. Law schools don’t seem to be a great place to learn what you need to practice law.
2. Continuing to do something ineffectively is justified so long as that’s how you’ve always done it.
3. Employing the logic displayed by law schools can be detrimental to your future career as a lawyer.
Monday, January 16, 2006
1. Shockingly it’ll only be 2 weeks into the semester before I get my financial aid money this is quite an improvement from the month and a half it took last semester.
2. Everybody who reads this knows I’m a hermit. Because of this I was quite freaked out by the number of people I know. Honestly, it’s about 20 people, a small amount for a law student in general, but an astounding amount for me.
3. I’ve had quite a bit of fun so far, though very little (almost none) of it having to do with the classes. Friday night was the high point so far with it’s bowling and virtual boxing.
So ok, that’s about it. A boring update, but at least you know what’s going on.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
This movie has me thinking that becoming a masked Luchador would be a great hobby. The masked guys never remove their masks so I can do it with total anonymity. If I ever move to southern Texas, California, or Arizona be sure to look for me on Univision under the name “El Rito De la Noche.”
And while I’m talking about luchadors and priests here is a link to The Church of La Parka. La Parka is a Luchador who’s costume looks like a skeleton (Kind of like the skeleton ninjas from Karate Kid) and is the wrestling world’s most proficient user of a steel chair. If anyone who reads this blog ever runs out of ideas on what to buy me for any given holiday the La Parka merchandise from his official page would be a great gift.